Ron Tachuk

On November 20th, 2006 at approximately 630 pm my dad took his last labored breath. Dad had been in the hospital since November 13th dealing with pneumonia. He had a lot of other complications because of his poor health and his many addictions. Over the last week he went through a lot of change. He was drowsy and not lucid. He thought he was at that "shithole" the Royal Alec (his words). He thought he had been in hospital for 7 months and that we were transferrring him back and forth. He kept asking for his cigarettes and his tylenol (two staples of his existence!) They tried three different types of antibiotic but his pneumonia would not get better. Over the last month or so of him living with me I could see him deteriorating on a regular basis. The loss of that house that he lived in and gave his life to was a burden that I believe he did not want to bear. This past year has been incredibly tough on him as he lost his mother (December 10th, 2005) and had to move out of his home.
The road to moving him out was not an easy one. Dad could be very uncooperative. Dad had his own ideas about things and if anyone suggested he do something different, chances are that he would choose the opposite. He could be quite the character. We had many an argument. I remeber the day that he ws supposed to move out of the house. We had talked about it and agreed to move him on a Saturday and when the day came he did not want to go. So we moved his stuff out and he slept on the floor in his house for another week with no TV or any other creature comfort!
He could be very aggravating at times but I loved him. I think for the most part I had come to deal with my "dad issues" a number of years ago. For a long time I was angry at him and disappointed with his behaviour. I didn't think he really cared for me or loved me, but I was wrong. He did the best he could with what he had. When I think about it I realize that my dad was light years ahead of his father. His father cheated on his mom, beat the crap out of him, never said that he loved him and was absent most of dad's life. My dad loved his family and told me that on many occasions. He didn't beat me and he adopted me at birth and I did not know that till I was thirty. He accepted me as his own and I never knew that I was "adopted" because I was his first born son. That is how he treated me. I can look back and focus on the things he did wrong, said wrong, or did not do. Or I can realize he did the best with what he had and accept him as he was...imperfect but loved. I can focus on the things that I loved about him and laugh about some of the things that drove me batty. Dad was a horder and he has a lot of crap. I loved going on vacation with him to Kelowna. Vacation was when dad was the happiest. He loved to build the fire and BBQ outside by the tent trailer. Dad consistently took us every year. We played cards by the light of the coleman propane lantern. We listened to Tom Jones and Elvis Presley as we drove. Dad would let you sit on his knee at times as he drove (that is if he didn't have a bottle there already!!!)
The Dr said he was a high mileage 60 and I do believe that to be true. He did it "His way" and that may not have been very smart but it was typically dad.
I am just thankful that he is no longer in any pain. He was lonely and sad and the quality of his life had diminished to such a state that it was irreparable. For his sake I am glad this painful existence is over. In the last days I shared with him about God's love and forgiveness. I encouraged him to call out to God from Psalm Chapter 4. I told him that God would accept him as he was and that he loved him. We are thankful that in his last days his family was at his side and that he knew he was loved. I am going to miss you dad and I pray that you rest peacefully because you deserve it. Finally, no more pain, no more sickness.